A Nightly Habit

Will you have pie with ice cream on top

or on the side?

I don’t really know when we began this routine. It may have been when the kids were little and we’d have our dessert after we tucked them in at night.

These days we often do our separate things together in the evenings. He might do some yard work, I might water flowers. He might work on some plans he brought home from work and I might work on some aspect of my photo hobby. Sometimes we have company, sometimes we go and see our Moms. Often we go for a long walk, a nice 2 or 3 mile brisk walk, aka a sprint by one dear family member.

But every night about an hour before we go to bed, we unwind in the most predictable fashion. He makes coffee, I get out dessert and we sit down for some good HGTV or an episode of our favorite (TV series) season. Okay, so it's not always pie, maybe fruit with ice cream or yogurt or some cookies.
You say dessert before bed? Yes and real coffee, please - and then we go and sleep like babies. Actually I don't know where that term comes from because we don't wake up and cry at night, but you get the idea. I know this is not normal for our age, so you may want to check back with us in a few years.

Click here for the pie recipe. Surprise someone special tonite and don’t tell them that you got the idea from a blog.

The Fruit of the Spirit - Kindness

Kindness and goodness are so inter-related that it’s difficult to separate them. Beth Moore suggests that “without kindness, goodness becomes harsh and self-righteous (while) without goodness, kindness becomes indulgent tolerance.”

In our study of the meaning of kindness we were directed to how God has shown kindness in history and through His son, Jesus.

We studied passages that portrayed God as a father, even a father who has been hurt by disobedience and rebelliousness. We saw Him as a father who understands and desires good things for us and a father who nurtures His children.

In personal reflection, I have come to experience the kindness of God most when I felt I had to give something up and in the end He gave back more – so much more! Isn’t that a true father’s heart and true kindness – desiring what is best for his children and allowing hard things to make us better in the end? Zephaniah 3:17 refers to God as taking delight in us, quieting us with his love and rejoicing over us with singing.

We also see what kindness is by how and whom Jesus showed kindness to when He walked this earth. He healed the sick and stood up for the outcasts. The examples that stand out to me, through this study, are the people he sought out after He arose from death. He personally met up with the grieving woman (Mary), sought out his brother (James) who had mocked him and a doubting disciple (Thomas), to show kindness in the way they each personally had need of it.

The kindness that the Spirit produces in our lives, is tenderhearted, forgiving, nurturing, helps those who can’t help themselves and lovingly draws the mocker and the doubter.

Happy Anniversary, Ben and Kari

How can it be . . . our blessings have been multiplied since the two of you became one!

"Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name - the name you gave me - so that they may be one, as we are one . . . My prayer is not that you take them out of the world, but that you protect them from the evil one . . . Set them apart by the truth, your word is truth."

from the prayer of Jesus in John 17

Celebrate this day!

Look back . . .

laugh . . .

learn . . .

love . . .

live for future blessings.

We love you!

Mom and Dad

Concert at the New Arena

And a friend’s a friend forever, if the Lord’s the Lord of them . . .

Yup, we were there as well. . . laughing as the audience waved their cell phones, like eyes in the dark – actually making MWS stop and laugh. It shows my age, but it would seem like everything I write about does. So why stop now?


Last night we parked our car on a church parking lot and joined thousands of other thirty, forty and fifty ‘somethings’ heading for the local sports arena, where a large stage was set up and the floor changed to seating ability.

Michael W. Smith and Steven Curtis Chapman under the same roof was probably a first for all of us. Our own local Christian music artist, Brian Doerksen was there as well and ushered us into the four hours of great music. Music from the past and music still being recorded . . . gave us just a glimpse of glory, as we joined in praise and testimony of our God.

What impressed me about these artists is that they have stood the test of time. A generation ago, they charted into, what was then still relatively new territory, that of Christian contemporary gospel/pop music. I kind of see them as the forerunners to the great selection of artists we have today.

I appreciated how Steven Curtis Chapman shared about the tragedy in their family that happened just last year and how that has affected his music. One can’t help but notice that trials have made his message even more real. A golden oldie he sang is called “Tomorrow morning when you wake up, and the sun does not appear, I will be there . ..” It was a song he wrote for his young wife many years ago, whom he mentioned with loving pride. He also introduced us to two of his sons playing in the band. To me this spoke volumes!

Michael W. Smith shared how, at the beginning of his music carrier, he felt like God’s love for him was based on his performance. Until one day, when he had an experience where God, through His Spirit, told him, “Michael, I love you. Not only that, I really, really like you. In fact I’m quite fond of you.” I got a little emotional about this, because it reminded me of a similar experience I had 26 years ago. It’s one that is hard to explain, but one that I believe God desires each one of us to have.

This show was not a show. It was a concert of praise to a God who has a good plan for our lives. What was shared was that there are two things that matter – today and ‘that’ day. And if we believe in that day, then our today will be lived according to that. Let us show compassion and forgiveness while we have time to do so. For some of us it takes music to spur us on. It’s a beautiful gift.

The Fruit of the Spirit - Patience

The fourth characteristic that the Spirit desires to produce in my life is patience. The question Beth asks is, “What would it be like if you refused to allow the behavior of others to spoil your day? Patience is inspired my mercy, devoid of condemnation and evidence of the presence and power of our Holy God.”

The patience referred to here is specifically patience in respect to people. The Bible refers to God’s patience leading to salvation. I never really put it together before that patience and forgiveness go hand in hand. Therefore patience will wait in passing judgment, keeping in mind the patience God has with me.

In explaining about forgiveness, Jesus told a story about a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. He called in a man who owed him 10,000 talents. When the servant fell on his knees and begged for patience, the king had mercy on him and forgave his debt. The servant then went out and sought out a fellow servant who owed him a very small amount in comparison. This servant fell on his knees and begged for mercy, but was thrown in jail. When the king heard about this he had the first servant also thrown in jail and tortured.
This parable tells me a something about forgiveness, but mostly about unforgiveness. When I harbor unforgiveness toward someone, I’m the one who’s tortured. What I need to remember is that forgiveness doesn’t make the offense right, it make me alright. Patience prompted by mercy and resulting in forgiveness is not human patience and it allows God to redeem the wrong in a way only He can.

My prayer is that God fill me with mercy that withholds quick judgment in the everyday kind of annoyances I face; situations that I don’t know the details about and where patience may be all a person needs at that moment.

Just Like Uncle Ben

Any parent of just one child would think that the parents in these photos are just plain irresponsible, but I have to explain that these are both third kids - it's called surviving.

Mommy had to take a quick shower before facing another busy day. She was organized, breakfast was ready. An older sibling helped her sister out of the crib and off she went. The photo reminded me of another time, another place.

I think the story on this one is similar . . . it was 25 years ago.

Looking Back and Moving Ahead

We moved my Mom from a rather large townhouse into an apartment this past weekend. Packing up dishes that she brought from Brazil 42 years ago,

and dishes Dad collected for her at the gas station . . . (was it a certain number of fill ups that gave you a place setting?) . . . my sister pointed out the fact these are washable.

In the mix was second hand furniture my parents bought at that time, tablecloths that date back to the wedding, a very old unfinished patchwork quilt made from real scraps, large framed wedding pictures, photo albums of cute grandchildren now grown, deep-freezers, now emptied, never to be filled with Mom’s baking again and way too many disposable containers. There were items to be taken to good will, items to be sold and some to be kept.

It's great to see how much can be done when the family comes together. Her smaller space was painted, some new things were purchased and some old and things were moved in to make it her home – her first home alone.

It turned out that on the day of the actual move I did not even step foot in the old place since I was at the new one, directing, cleaning and unpacking. I fought the urge to go back just once more to the old place. After all, it was the last place my parents lived in together.

As I pondered the need to say goodbye, I came to the conclusion to just let it be. In my heart, I think that this is what Mom would feel about this place where the harsh realities of life hit her like never before. I would say it had a room where her knees knew the feel of the carpet as she wept aloud over a child’s broken marriage - while she, herself was learning what it means to stick together in sickness and in health, for better or for worse. A home where she faithfully catered to my dad’s failing health, the marks on the walls or baseboards bearing witness to bumps from the walker and later the wheelchair, passing away ten years after his paralyzing stroke.

My Mom will begin anew, while I’m observing and taking notes. I sat at the table that my sister set for us last night and so appreciated her gift of hospitality after a difficult and busy week. I also thought about the beautiful meal prepared for us by friends just before this crazy week began, when we sat out late into the evening in the Arabian tent enjoying lemon meringue pie and talking. These are the things that matter, the things I appreciated this week – relationships, people taking time to use the gifts they’ve been given, encouraging one another and living for what will count in the end.

Today

Does Jesus care when I’ve said goodbye
To the dearest on earth to me?
When my heart, it aches till it nearly breaks
Does Jesus know, does He see?

Oh yes, He cares. I know He cares
His heart is touched by my grief
When the days are dreary
The long nights weary
I know my Saviour cares.

(this sorrow is not so much for me as it is for my sister-in-law, nieces and nephews - to whom my heart goes out at this time)

For today - and I hope not only today . . . I will remember what really matters. The beautiful sound of the garage door opening, the sound of a baby's cry or my child calling for whatever it is he or she needs, the sound of my mom's voice. I will cherish the moments we can laugh about, every moment we can share, and not worry about trivial things, like a stain, slow traffic or shrinking a shirt. I want to hug more often and smile more at the ones I love.

It is good to see the line where life as we know it ends and where life forever begins.

"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

The Fruit of the Spirit - Peace

Peace is a rare commodity in a world where we continually strive for more of one thing or another – sometimes not even knowing what. People can acquire wealth, power and recognition without ever knowing peace. On the other hand, people can know peace without ever feeling the pressure to attain wealth, honor or power. What is the secret and why is peace such a desired feeling?

One of the wisest men of old said, “A heart at peace gives life to the body.” Peace gives life as it guards our hearts and our minds. Peace is so closely related to joy that the enemy of our souls will do anything he can to steal our joy because he does not want us to know peace. The Bible says that he prowls about like a lion seeking whom he may devour. But Jesus said, “Peace I leave with you. I do not give as the world gives.” (John 14:27) In fact, He is called the Prince of Peace because through His death and resurrection He has made peace available to us by the forgiveness of our sins. This is why the fruit of the Spirit is peace.

Peace, not because of having a perfect life, but peace in knowing that all things work together for good for those who love God and are fitting into His plan. Jesus showed us by His life’s example how to know peace in being alone, in trusting for provision, in the storms of life, in waiting for something, in sadness and even in death. It all depends on where our focus is. Is it on the waves surrounding us or on Him who is walking the waves toward us?

One of my favorite verses even since I was a teenager has been Philippians 4:6,7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

Grow Old With Me

Happy Birthday, Hon! The one I dream with, fight with, laugh with, cry with . . . my all, my best friend! Today I can't help but thank our Lord for every birthday we can share . . .

from when we were just friends . . .

to building our first home ...

to seeing you become and be such a good dad . . .

to celebrating special milestones . . .

to seeing you walk our daughters down the isle . . .

to becoming 'Papa & Grammy' together.

I pray God blesses you with continued health, strength and joy. I love you for the seasons we've shared, for the one we're in and for what is still to come.

The Fruit of the Spirit - Joy

I chose the above picture because it somehow symbolizes a beauty that can show up in the most unexpected places. Joy reflects a beauty even in the midst of poverty or sadness and is not dependent on outward circumstances.

Joy is the second fruit of the spirit listed in Galatians 6:22, and is a direct response to what God had done for us. In this short overview, I will list three reasons I can reflect a joy that is not dependent on what we normally think we need to be joyful.

When the disciples of Jesus came to Him, rejoicing because of being able to perform miraculous signs, Jesus said, “Do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” One day the Book of Life will be opened and the only thing that will matter is that my name is written in it. With that assurance, what else really matters? This is my foremost reason to rejoice.

A second reason I can rejoice is in knowing that God desires to show Himself to me in every circumstance - even, and more often so, in the hard things. It is in the difficulties that we will more likely call out to Him and rely on Him. It reminds me of the song that goes, “If I never had a problem, I wouldn’t know that God could solve it.” Beth Moore emphasizes that “the presence, purpose and power of God are best discovered through difficulty.” The Bible also says to consider it joy when we face various trials (James1:2) because of the way our character can be built through them. There is joy in knowing that God is in control and knows the end from the beginning.

And finally, but definitely not least or last, we have hopefully all experienced the joy of a restored relationship, whether with a friend, co-worker or family member. Forgiveness is a feeling beyond compare! In the Christian’s life, the reality of being restored to fellowship with our Maker is another reason to exude joy. Being forgiven for my sins in the past and continued grace in my everyday life, should allow me to offer forgiveness to others and spread this kind of joy. “The joy of the Lord is my strength.”

In The Mourning

“Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death . . .” Psalm 23:4

Jesus wept at the death of His friend, even though He knew that at His command, Lazarus would be resurrected. Mourning does not mean that we don’t believe, but it is a natural process of letting go, even if just for a time.

In his book Traveling Light Max Lucado writes, “Why does grief linger? Because you are dealing with more than memories - you are dealing with unlived tomorrows. You’re not just battling disappointment; you’re battling anger . . . Why? Why him? Why now? Why us?”

He suggests that the key truth to stand on is that our God is a good God. Long ago God knew that we each would face the pain of death and He provided a way to soften the pain. He allowed His son to taste death for us, so that in accepting His death on our behalf, we can have hope . . . the hope of eternal life. Lucado explains that two thousand years ago the truck of death ran over the Lord Jesus in order that only its shadow might run over us. I think of a shadow as being temporary. Once it passes, we see the light. Our loved one is beholding that light, while we wait on God to restore our soul with hope. Without hope, we are in a jungle with no way out, but seeing the rescue helicopter changes everything. Our surroundings have not changed, but hope has changed everything.

So we mourn, but not as those who have no hope. “And I- in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness.” Psalm 17:15

Generations

Sometimes, when I can’t decide if I should post about a personal or family matter, I ask myself, “Does it have something to do with seasons?” When I get this resounding , “Yes” it kind of gives me inspiration to move ahead, since I do like to focus is on the seasons of life and the brevity of time.

Recently we hosted a baby shower for my niece. Proud Oma and Uroma (great-grandma) had the special privilege of holding her 50th great-grandchild!


Or was it #51? Either way, one is being held by (granddaughter/mom) Carolyn who has the awesome responsibility, along with her husband, to raise twin boys!

We got together to meet the newest little members . . .

enjoy some food . . .

and help them out with some practical gifts. . .

Isn't that what 'being family' is about?

Happy Birthday, Doris

One thing is certain . . .


We will never run out of things to say!


How could I not help but think about you when I saw this card! After walking together for more than 20 years now, I know that we'll never run out of things to say. When we were young ( hey, barely out of our 20's) we exchanged babysitting, we saw our youngest ones off to Kindergarten, discussed teachers, report cards, school activites and took turns helping out at the school. We saw our kids go through their teens, birthday parties, carpools, baketball games, applications for post secondary education and the letting go that came with that. Then came the weddings - each of the six weddings were "planned" as we walked. And now the grandkids! Our lives keep changing, but there is a constant that keeps us going without a lot of explanation.

It's so good to have a friend to walk with!
I wish you a most special day, my friend!

The Fruit of the Spirit - Love

The Beth Moore Study explains the different kinds of love and takes you through a more in-depth look at the love that is referred to in the Fruit of the Spirit. Obviously I can’t, and don’t even want to, re-create a whole study here but I want to highlight what most impressed me about this agape love that is poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit.

This is a love that is not necessarily based on a feeling. It is also not based on a relationship built on common interests. It supersedes the kind of love that is reciprocal, shared or earned. It is an unselfish response fueled by a need.

We tend to romanticize agape love by reading what is referred to as the Love Chapter (1 Corinthians 13), at weddings and so forth, but probably understand a little more about it when we begin celebrating Anniversaries. It says that:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails.

I am incapable of this kind of love! My heart condemns me and convinces me that I do not have perfect love. But the Bible says that God is greater than our hearts, and He can and wants to pour His love into us, so that we can be the vessels of His love shown to others. The suggestion in the study is that when I face a situation where love does not come naturally, I need to:
- admit that I lack the love needed
- ask for divine leading and help
- consider how Jesus would respond
- act in obedience

In the end, this causes a chain reaction of a far greater feeling and far greater results than any human attempts could administer. God is able to tender us towards the difficult person and we ourselves are blessed by being a vessel that He could use to show His love. There may be a situation where it is impossible to even face a person who has wronged us, but we can begin by praying for that person on a regular basis and wait to see what God will do.
The final words in the love chapter remind me that love never fails. It is never in vain and never without effect, even if I don’t see the results.