It would be interesting to know what this one word brings to mind. Sitting here right now at my computer, I think about roots and where we come from. We talk about a family tree. A tree has branches and I think about our family branching out. There is family that has been grafted in, so to say, and become part of that tree.We had a discussion one morning, part of which had to do with different ways that we are raised. It was a hard topic to address, but in the end it was so good. Communication happens when one person understands another. When we understand where we are coming from and where we are going, we are better able to help each other get there.
In a family it is so important to communicate. Family is fragile and we need to handle it with care. I have witnessed how in one family a quick judgment was made, words were spoken and not understood, leading to a broken relationship where one side or the other is allowing it to fester. This kind of thing makes me sad, when I know that we really all want the same thing. Who does not want a good family relationship?
How can we get past our own hurts and try to understand the other side? When we do this, healing begins. Talking and listening is important to understand each other. When forgiveness happens, relationships grow and become better because of the hurdle we’ve jumped together. I really believe that we can become stronger through difficulties that are handled correctly. We can become better, rather than bitter.
So, why these serious thoughts today? I am posting a photo of a table setting in our backyard. A formal dinner we had with just our grown kids . . . china, candles, good food, dessert and ending off with a guitar and several of the couples singing some of their favorite songs as the stars came out.
Now this may sound too perfect . . . it was . . . it was my favorite evening. I could have posted only that and maybe a picture of them all – dressed up, but it would have given you the wrong impression. So I decided to be honest and tell you that this evening only happened to be so perfect because of a difficult conversation we had earlier. Hopefully our family has grown in more than one way.
family: a treasured possession
10 comments:
Anneliese, it is your refreshing honesty that keeps me coming back day after day to see what morsel of wisdom I will gain from your insight.
Anneliese. . .I so appreciate your honesty that even your family that looks so perfect . .still has growing pains. Is there a family that doesn't?
This is a subject that is rarely touched on because then we'd have to admit that there are issues.
You really have wisdom Anneliese. .and I admire you. I've learned so much from you too.
I know whereof you speak...and some things are hard to speak about...but thanks for sharing. How nice to eat together...and to sing together...after addressing a difficult issue. That's how it should be...but often isn't.
Anneliese, thank you for your transparency today...in such a public forum through your blog. It speaks well of you..to me. It is real, it is understood....by me. We also this past year had to talk through some hurts in our family...some things we all had to give and take in. Some areas we have all been challenged in. Those times hurt and heal...if you are willing. Since then we have grown closer and understand each other better. I think you and I can say our family tree is growing stonger... deeper roots, stronger branches. I just loved the way you set the formal table to enjoy the joy of your grown children. Interesting...our grown kids set a beautiful table and atmoshere for us during our needed time as well. What a gift that was to us, and I'm sure that gift from you will be forever etched in your children's hearts. I share this blessing with you. Kathy
growing pains - painful but necessary. families could use more honesty in their relationships; though it can be hard, it is so vital.
thanks for sharing this.
My heart is so in tune with this post..thank you Anneliese.
Blessings..
So often when hard times come in a family, we think we are the only ones it happens to. We too have had some hard times - 3 kids, same upbringing but each so different. Add 3 spouses, also unique in personality and from various backgrounds and then mix in 2 parents who often do or say the wrong thing. It can be a mess! Thankfully when God is at work in willing hearts He can make it into something fun and beautiful. Not perfect but good.
jThanks for your insight Anneliese.
Thanks for reminding us that even the most perfect looking family has it's growing pains....it gives all of us perspective that we are not alone, that all families deal with their own hurts and disappointments, and that by being honest with one another we can all be encouraged and grow even closer.
I love reading your posts, Anneliese - they are always thoughtful and thought provoking.
When you mentioned family and family roots and trees, I immediately thought of a plaque I got for my birthday from a neighbour. It says the Roots of a Family Tree start with Two Hearts.
and I would add - united with God's LOVE !
What family wouldn't feel special to be invited to the table you prepared for them !!
Yes, Anneliese, there are those times in our lives. I too can say, that I had some unexpected hurdles in my camping trip last week, but nevertheless some issues needed to be dealt with.
We smiled on our last night and said "It was worth it all."
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